Well, hello there! Long time no see! Thanks for coming back. It means a lot in general, but given my lack of regular posting (oops), it means even more that you still clicked on the link and opened up this bad boy!

It’s been a wild ride since I last wrote, and I have a lot to update you on. So let’s just dive right into it, shall we?

In July, I came back from being in Asia for seven months. Whoa Nelly. Talk about a mind-f*ck. If you read some of my other posts, like this one, you’ll know I struggled tremendously with my decision to sell all my things and move across the world for an indefinite amount of time. Culture shock, wondering if I’d made the right call in coming to Asia in the first place, etc. But by the time time I got to Vietnam, Hoi An specifically, I was finally settling into a groove. The culture shock wasn’t so jarring; I had made some friends; I had a cute apartment with a little outdoor kitchen on a balcony. I was starting to feel like I could do this thing (as in traveling) for a long time. Finally, I was starting to really love it.

And then I came home. I missed my family, my friends, my dog. I missed things being easy and normal. But when I arrived into the Seattle Airport after twenty hours of flying, I found myself a stranger yet again, in a place that felt unfamiliar despite having lived there for 35 years. Reverse culture shock, I guess you could say.

Since that moment a month ago (how has it already been a month that I’ve been back?!), it’s all been a little crazy and I’ve felt completely overwhelmed. I think that’s just the chapter of life I’m in. One doesn’t totally upend their life and expect a smooth transition. However, I am happy to be home, even though I miss Asia and can’t wait to head back there in October. But more on that later.

What I really want to talk about is my decision to SELF-PUBLISH my freakin’ book!

I call it my Cannibal book, but it’s actual title (for now, it’s subject to change because I am indecisive) is What We Keep Inside. It’s a dual-perspective horror romance about a man named Hayes who flees North Carolina after his mom dies and his dad is involved in a mysterious accident that leaves him brain-damaged, and a woman named Birdie who discovers she can finally feel emotions by consuming people. As she discovers what it’s like to feel, she falls in love with Hayes, the reticent, reclusive boy-next-door. The two dive headfirst into a complicated relationship and soon, the skeletons in both their closets show themselves to one another with devastating, and deadly, consequences.

This book was written during a dark time in my life; it was cathartic to write something so grotesque, so effed up. This story means a lot to me, and my characters have become like real, dear people to me. I’ve been working on it since 2023.

Originally, I wanted to go the traditional publishing route and land a big, fat deal with one of the big, fat five publishing companies (every writer’s dream!). For the past several months, I have been stuck in the query trenches, and while that is normal, and rejection is the name of the game in trad publishing, it was (is) discouraging.

I’ve been writing since I can remember, and it’s grown from a hobby to a passion. Lately, it’s given me a purpose. After quitting my full-time job to travel, I got a super-duper part time job as a freelance reporter for a local newspaper, but other than that, I don’t work, and while that’s been great, it leaves me feeling aimless at times. When I set out for Asia, I wanted my time to mean something beyond just seeing parts of the world many never get to. I didn’t want to waste the wealth of opportunity I’d been given. Beyond doing touristy things during my time in Nepal and Vietnam, I wrote. A lot. I treated writing my book like a full time job. And then I sent off my query letter and played the waiting game.

But when I came home, I started to itch for something else to do. I felt like tackling something huge. I felt like putting myself in a position to learn and grow and stretch. So, after multiple conversations with a dear friend about it, who’s been adament from the beginning about me going this route, I decided TO HECK WITH ALL! I’m going to self-publish this story. I’m going to share Hayes and Birdie with the world.

Do I still want to be traditionally published? You betcha! I’m not writing it off the table. Becoming self-published doesn’t automatically pull the plug on making it with one of the big five companies. But I think I have a real opportunity here, and I’m going to take it. Why does success have to look one, specific way? Why does success have to be determined by others? There are multiple paths to the same place.

In the decision to self-publish my book, I knew I’d need to create a writing-specific Instagram account. The only way my book will be successful is if people read it (beyond my lovely friends and family who can stomach a story about cannibalism), and to get the word out about it, you have to go viral. Still working on the viral part! I have a love-hate relationship with social media. Don’t we all, to some degree? But it is fun learning how to be a content creator or whatever the heck it is you consider an aspiring author who posts things and hopes to be noticed. I’m learning a new skill that will be useful to me regardless of how I get published.

Deciding to go this route is exciting and scary. But man, I’m so jazzed for it. I feel delusional in this dream, but I think you have to be a little delusional when you want something huge.

I plan on using this blog as a way to get the word out about my book – updates, behind-the-scenes, chapter previews. All of that and more! I’m sure I’ll pepper in stuff about my travels here and there, but for now, we’re switching gears and I’m PSYCHED! Hopefully you are too.

Also, if you don’t like horror, or can’t imagine yourself reading my book, that’s OKAY. I know my book does not appeal to everyone. Sometimes, I’m even like, why the heck did I write this thing? But this story served a purpose when I wrote it, and in sharing it with the world, I hope it can mean a lot to someone else, too.

So anywhoo. Besides writing my little heart out and learning about this instagram thing, I cut my hair off and saw Magnus, AKA the love of my life. I’ve been eating all the foods I did not have access to in Asia and riding the bus a lot since I don’t have a car. It’s a nice little life and I’m feeling very content!

Thanks for reading and supporting 🙂 Leave a comment below about what you’d like to see in regards to my book, this blog or anything else that randomly pops into your brain!

Until next time 🙂